Intimacy & Sex

Let’s talk about sex and intimacy, and you’re right: they are not inter-changeable, but how great when they show up together!

Imagine being able to be completely yourself, excited and utterly free about your sexuality, and really happy with what is going on in the privacy  of your bedroom (or other rooms, for that matter).  If that seems more like a beautiful dream than the reality, then Sex Coaching is for you.  It is a client-centered, sex-positive, non-pathologizing approach to helping you get what you want sexually, relationally, and energetically.  Knowing that sex can be one of our greatest joys, it is heartbreaking to read the statistics about the high number of sexless relationships in this country.  There are so many people who feel frustrated or hopeless about their sex lives, and it doesn’t have to be this way.

The field of Sexology, which is the study of what people do sexually, and how they think and feel about it, has expanded in wonderful ways recently, and Sex Coaching utilizes the most up-to-date research to help you get the information, inspiration and healing you need to further develop your Sexual Voice and maximize your sexual potential.  Whether you want to re-create that spark in your relationship, awaken within yourself a deeper sexual intimacy, or move into new frontiers of exploration, having a Sex Coach to facilitate learning and trying new behaviors is a truly positive step.

Sex Coaching both differs from and shares certain things in common with Sex Therapy.  It’s a creative and collaborative approach, designed to help clients understand, communicate and resolve sexual concerns during specific stages in their lives.  Sex Therapy often focuses on helping clients who suffer from specific sexual dysfunctions, such as erectile dysfunction, pain during intercourse, or paraphilias (a biomedical term used to describe sexual arousal to objects, situations, or individuals that are not part of “normative” stimulation).  A Sex Therapist is trained to go into the background of how these issues came about, and from there work towards finding healthy solutions.  Sex Coaching’s orientation will focus more on helping the client figure out what isn’t working now, and developing ways to help them make it work better in the future.  It’s a fluid process, which is very focused on empowerment and differentiation.  Sex Coaching can be similar to Sex Therapy, in that it promotes inquiry, understanding and healing, especially from emotional or even spiritual wounds.  Education is a big component, so “home-play assignments,” reading lists, and even field trips are developed for each client.

Intimacy Training includes coaching about sensuality and sex, but it expands the conversation, helping you explore your emotional life more deeply, both in what is happening now, and unpacking past experiences.  I will actively provide guidance in the most effective ways to build intimacy, help to re-frame the content of a couples’ experiences,  and teach exercises that pave the way toward deeper intimacy. The ground covered both in Sex Coaching and Intimacy Training I see as necessary to creating a really rich life, and can be utilized by individuals wanting to get to know themselves better, or for couples needing help.

I have done my Clinical Sexology training with Dr. Patti Britton, one of the shining lights in the sexology field, and a great trainer and mentor.  I am certified in her method of Sex Coaching, as well as the PLISSIT model used extensively in Sex Therapy. I have worked towards certification as a Sex Therapist by AASECT, the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists.  Mine is an integrative approach, addressing the Mind, Emotions, Body and Body Image, Energy and Spirit, and includes assessment and an action plan to achieve certain goals.  As a longtime yoga practitioner, I was delighted to discover this method, as it perfectly mirrors an ancient yogic model, known as the 5 Sheaths Model, for addressing human concerns.  And as a licensed psychotherapist as well, I can combine Sex Coaching with couples or individual therapy, if desired.

Please feel free to call or email, to discuss how this kind of coaching may be of benefit to you and your relationship!